Remembering Your Baby
During the days, weeks, months and years following the death of your son or daughter, you may find some of the following acknowledgments of your baby to be comforting:
- Planting a shrub or tree in memory of your baby, perhaps one that flowers around the time of the birth date or another significant day.
- Keeping a journal or diary to write about your baby, about the hopes and dreams you had and the things you would have done together.
- Writing poetry or songs about your baby and about your own experience of loss.
- Drawing the image you have of your baby, or having an artist professionally draw your baby from a description or photograph.
- Sending cards, birth announcements or writing to family and friends letting them know what has happened.
- Choosing a piece of jewellery, e.g. a locket on a chain, a bracelet, a birthstone or ring engraved with your baby’s name or initials.
- You may choose to have a tattoo or piercing to symbolise your child.
- Choosing a special painting, book or ornament to place in your home in memory of your baby.
- Placing a memorial to your baby in the personal notices section of the newspaper.
- Collecting any ultrasound pictures, medical reports and papers, arm bands, etc. from your hospital admission.
- Creating a name giving or a memorial certificate, or applying for a copy of your baby’s birth certificate, which can be displayed at home or kept in an album with other mementos.
Any of the above suggestions may be of use and there are no right or wrong ways to create memories of your baby.
“We have an album and I kept some of her clothes.
They are precious reminders of my baby’s life.”
This article was prepared using extracts from Stillbirth and Neonatal death1. The full text is available online or contact Red Nose Grief and Loss Services on 1300 308 307 for a printed version.
Last reviewed: 7/12/24
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1. Ford, D., Richardson, R., Robertson, S-E., Stammers, R., Oxlade, E., Carter, J. & SIDS and Kids. (2016). Stillbirth and Neonatal death: A Booklet By and for Parents whose Baby is Stillborn or Dies soon after Birth. Malvern, Vic.: SIDS and Kids. (Original work published 2004 entitled Treasured Babies).